Are Participants Of Bigg Boss Really Insane?

bigg-boss

I am a big fan of Bigg Boss since some years. Not that I a ma sadist but this show is really entertaining and a useful lesson for a student of psychology; like me.

A friend recently told me she doesn’t like to watch this because she thinks that only insane people take part in this show.

She’s actually right—partially.

Although, it might feel that it’s a scripted show but the truth isn’t this. I have some close friends who work for this television channel and the production house who makes this show. This show is in fact, crafted with subtle situations that evoke certain emotions in a particular participant.

All the participants are chosen carefully as per the scripted situations that is going to crack them up and make them look insane.

But wait. What is insane? Let us understand this in detail.

Dictionary.com describes insane as not of sound mind; mentally deranged or utterly senseless. Having said this, let us explore that who are these insane people in our world. Is it the ones who participate in such television shows?

Then who are the ones who loot the country, rape women, break traffic rules, litter around, play blame-game, abuse children, speak blatant lies, disrespect elders, speak ill of others, destroy environment, accumulate wealth from wrong sources, involved in all the sins we can think of and ask such insane question; judge others.

I haven’t seen anyone who is free from any of the above qualities; including myself. Then who are these people? Are they sane because they’re not in Bigg Boss?

Multi-billion dollar question.

Advertisements

Confession: Lessons From Lust

three-flowers

This image from Google search inspired me to write this blog post. It’s really strange—and beautiful—how certain images trigger different emotions is us.

I had been a lustful man all my life. The only aim was to have a sexual intercourse with all the women I met; mostly on the first date.

And guess what? I was even getting good at it.

It was not that bad but many times it brought my inner-self in guilt and embarrassment; but only when I started to introspect. When I was in the mode of ignorance, I was in bliss. But there are lessons to be learnt.

Blessed are the pure in heart; for they shall see God.

The above quote is an old saying. Although, I didn’t see God as such, but my being pure to some, I really felt really good—till date I feel the goodness. And for me this goodness is God. Having said this, I am experiencing a complete rewind in my life-journey. I am going back to my school-college life where these three girls were the only one that I never looked upon with my lusty eyes; or let’s say that these three girls kept me pure all my life.

Till date.

  1. I clearly remember, it was 1988. Hindi film Tezaab was released in theaters across India and the bud of fondness was released in my heart. She was in same school but another class. I adored her; a lot.
  2. In 1994, there was another who I adored. She was a different human altogether but I guess we are different. She was quiet and I was a violent wind of words. That cuteness must have really killed many in school.
  3. After school, I entered college in 1995 and met her. In fact, she was the fist female friend ever. I remember talking to her on phone for hours. She was so dynamic and yet so simple at heart.

I don’t know but I never had any lustful feeling about them. I respected them for what they are and not what I wanted them to be. They till are in touch and we are good friends now but the purity in my heart will always remain.

I also remember another incident from college days. There was a student whom I used to teach Economics. I was good at studies and used to take tuition for pocket money. She secured good marks in the subject and offered me a gift. She was one bad-ass girl all the boys wanted to be with. I politely rejected any gift other than a fee. She insisted that I can ask anything, even her body as a gift. I just asked her to smile and be a good person in life.

She was furious, really but I am happy for what I did.

I really feel that it’s not about lust all the time. In fact, it’s not about lust most of the time but another emotions that keeps us running. And emotional diversity in anyway good for health.

Like in the case of these three women, there was no love as such, but there was a pure fondness; a selfless one-way one. But, all said and done, I really feel great when I think about these three women who gave me a different dimension altogether. It’s because of them I am a useful, sober, balanced and mindful human being.

Although, it was sometime about lust or sometime it wasn’t, lust was a great teacher to me. It has brought out the best and worst in me from time-to-time.

 

If You Are Looking For That One Act Of Kindness That Will Go Far, Read On!

Kindness is one of the seven virtues. It can be defined as the righteous and caring attitude towards other. But the definition of the kindness does not limit to these two words only. It’s a complex term to comprehend yet simplest to realize.

Showing kindness towards others gives a feeling of joy and mirth to the recipient. The doer is also satiated by the feeling of warmth and compassion. It’s the basic driving force of the nature. The nature is so kind to us that it helps in flourishing the civilizations.

Kindness is taught by every belief systems. And you know what? I am the one who needs a lot of your kindness at this moment.

Agastya

I am a part of so much—part computer graphic artist, part philanthropist, part teacher, part blogger, part happiness coach, part mad, part numismatist, part seeker, part lover, part traveler, part poet, part writer, part thinker, part explorer, part adventurer, part failure, part winner, part looser, part fool, part genius, part leader, part follower, etc. I am still exploring myself and, meanwhile, sowing seeds of love and happiness.

I am on a new journey and strongly need to have friends from across the globe. I need to tell and hear stories. It will be fun to have different people to connect with me on my Facebook page.

I am reaching out to you connect with me and promise it will be a beautiful journey; together. Your act of kindness can bring me lot of goodness, exposure, happiness and the ripples will go far.

In Mumbai, We Have A Jungle Within A Jungle!

Do you know that Mumbai is a home to the world’s second largest urban park? If no, you have to read this.

Sanjay Gandhi National Park is a large protected area in the northern part of Mumbai. It encompasses an area of 104 km2 and is surrounded on three sides by India’s most populous city. The rich flora and fauna of this urban park attracts more than 2 million visitors every year. Tourists also enjoy visiting the 2400-year-old Kanheri caves sculpted out of the rocky cliffs which lie within the park.

sanjay-gandhi-52.jpg

FB_IMG_1505306386289.jpg

337948-sgnp2.jpg

The park is home to a number of endangered species of flora and fauna. The forest area of the park houses over 1000 plant species, 251 species of migratory, land and water birds, 50,000 species of insects and 40 species of mammals.

In addition, the park also provides shelter to 38 species of reptiles, 9 species of amphibians, 150 species of butterflies and a large variety of fish.

FB_IMG_1505306373435.jpg

FB_IMG_1505306418766

The park has faced a number of similar problems to those faced by national parks elsewhere in the world, involving conflicts between natural and human interests.

The lack of space in Mumbai has pushed residential colonies right up to the park boundary. This boundary is poorly fenced and has often allowed wild animals into human habitations. Slums have mushroomed around the park as well.

FB_IMG_1505306350793.jpg

The park also features a toy-train that runs on a narrow gauge railway. The toy train ran for around twenty-five years. I still remember going there once a month as a young child.

FB_IMG_1505306395824.jpg

This urban park is home to a large population of forest-dwelling tribal communities. They face man-animal conflict but they don’t budge out due to their ancient connect with the jungle.

This big patch of green not only helps us city folks breathe a bit easy but also give some much-needed quiet from the chaos of city life. For travelers, even a short trip to this oasis of green gives much-needed respite from the noise and crowds that they are constantly bombarded within the concrete jungle.

Sanjay Gandhi National Park is Mumbai’s own little weekend getaway that you can enjoy without ever leaving the city!

Tears Don’t Lie: I Cried A Lot That Night

Hello *****, can I call you that?

Agastya—is that you?!

Yes.

After a long time.

Yes. Almost 10 years.

How are you *****?

I am fine Agastya, how the hell are you? Where have you been?

I have been to London to look after the queen.

What a shitty joke, as usual.

Yes, I was always full of shit.

No. I didn’t mean that. But how come after such a long time?

I called you many times but you never answered.

WTF?!

Really.

But you don’t even have my phone number.

My heart called you man times, but your heart never answered.

OMG! You’re still the same boring philosopher, Agastya.

Almost.

Don’t feel bad.

There is nothing to feel bad about *****. Neither bad, nor me.

This is the conversation we had—on Facebook messenger—after 10 years of separation. I haven’t forgotten the sweet-bitter romantic journey, she also hasn’t.

We met many-many years ago online and cultivated our love is the world of binary digits. We never knew when the binary digits became one, when the digital romance transformed into a physical one.

A real one. A beautiful one.

lovers.jpg

We spent sleepless nights in the one of the most romantic cities of India. I was in Mumbai but visited her almost every weekend.

Two bodies melted into each other every weekend, to finally become one.

The sun never set, the day never came. The intoxication had us all the while. The moon, the empty streets, the cold nights, the auto-rickshaws, the whiskey glass, the cigarettes, the bed, the silence, the crease on the blanket of the bed, the room of the hotel where we stayed, in are still witness of this silent, joyful romantic journey.

But when it all ended, there was a loud noise. My heart shattered into million pieces with a bang.

pieces.jpg

I never came to know—till date—why it ended. Suddenly, she was not there. I was alone. It was random virus attack on my life. Just a phone call and it all came to an end.

I cried a lot.

I had all the ears to listen but she had nothing much to say. I drank my whiskey all night and in the morning, boarded the first flight to meet her. I booked the same hotel and waited for her to come to meet me.

I cried all night.

Once upon a time in school days, I lost my new windcheater and I cried a lot. I was scared and guilty. I was ashamed. I cried a lot that day and after that, I never cried.

But that night I cried a lot.

In the morning, she came to meet me. It was raining heavily; both in Mumbai and that city. Both the cities were crying. I begged her to stay with folded hands but she was done with me. I kept my head on her feet to forgive me but she had to go. I had all the questions, she had no answer.

I cried a lot.

I blamed her all the while but after many years, when I learnt the art and craft of introspection, slowly-slowly I realized some of my mistakes. I learn the art and craft of forgives, compassion, kindness and gratitude. That is the time I contacted her to seek forgiveness.

And to my surprise she was already waiting with folded hands to ask forgiveness for what she did.

mosaic-pieces.jpg

The chapter is closed now but I can’t forget that night when I cried all night long. Although, I have managed to get all the broken pieces—of my heart—together, I am unable to find some.

I can’t forget the tears; they were so innocent, so alone. They wanted to say so much but tears are just words the heart can’t say.

I can’t forget that night. I cried a lot.

Little Mehek’s Magical Birthday Party Gave Me Many Memorable Gifts!

I consider myself extremely fortunate to have been surrounded by loving friends—old and new. One of them, invited me to her daughter’s 10th birthday party. Actually, let me confess, I was self-invited.

This friend is a special one because we were school-mates, and we met recently after 22 years of sweet-bitter separation. I spoke to her daughter few days ago and I was planning to go for the party right from the time I self-invited myself.

The location was far from my place but somehow, I trusted the universe to make it happen, and it really did. I was under tremendous work pressure so I thought to take the shortest route; by local train.

Local trains in Mumbai are tougher than going to Mars; in the evenings. Hence, I attempted to catch a train in afternoon itself. Although, I have lived all my life in Mumbai, for the first time, I traveled this route. It was not less than playing rugby as the train was 30 minutes late. But somehow, I managed to reach the venue.

cake-and-mehek.jpg

The celebration was planned in a beautiful restaurant. There was balloons, lights, cold drinks, pizzas, masks and lot of children. The birthday girl—Mehek—wore a beautiful golden dress like Queen Clarion. I have worked for Disney for few years and for me whenever a girl looks cute, I think of Tinkerbell and other fairies in the story. I could also see the pixie dust coming out from her radiant dress.

Little Mehek is a vibrant child with the cutest smile I have ever seen in life. She talks so fluently with children of all ages. I gave her a joy-jar for this occasion and she seemed to be quite excited about the concept.

minu-and-deepak.jpg

I even met my friend’s husband—Deepak—and her mother. Her husband is a seasoned professional from advertising industry and a great orator. We spoke for almost an hour!

It was little Mehek’s birthday but looks like I got more than I gave. Although, there is no balance sheet that I have to tally but my asset side—my gifts—is heavy.

me-and-mehek.jpg

I took the road not taken, I met a golden fairy who was emitting pixie dust for real, I met my old school friend again, I met a great orator who took my breath away, and I received so much love from the entire family.

Triple Talaq—The Cult Of ‘Instant Divorce’ In Islam

Recently, India’s top court banned the controversial law that allowed Muslim men to end marriage by uttering talaq— Arabic word for divorce—three times.

But what is this cult of instant divorce?

Triple talaq is a form of Islamic divorce which has been used by Muslims in India. It allows any Muslim man to legally divorce his wife by stating the word talaq three times in oral, written, or more recently electronic form.

This mode of divorce is not universal among Muslims across the world, as many other Islamic schools of thought prefer the divorce process to be deferred, in many cases over a period of three months. The government has cited the example of many predominantly Muslim countries, including Pakistan, that have banned instant divorce.

muslim womens taking selfie.jpg

Although, divorce in Islam can take a variety of forms, some initiated by the husband and some initiated by the wife, men take undue advantage to this cult of instant divorce. This sort of divorce without gap between is considered not approved in Islam It is too rash, unfair and condemn-able. Only some of the laws given in the Quran is straight forward and the rest are subject to interpretation and the interpretations may change based on the social and economic development of man. Instant divorce is one such issue.

There is a 3-step process to follow divorce as per Sharia law:

  1. A couple can apply for first talaq in any judiciary body. After first one, Islam gives them one more chance for re-uniting within a waiting period of 3 months. A couple can re-unite within this waiting period, without any new marriage contract or following any rituals that is been followed in newly marriages.
  2. A couple can apply for second talaq in any judiciary body. After second one, Islam gives them last chance for re-uniting within same waiting period of 3 months, without any new marriage contract or following any rituals that is been followed in newly marriages.
  3. A couple can apply for third talaq in any judiciary body. After third one, they can’t re-unite.

In traditional Islamic jurisprudence, instant divorce is considered to be a particularly disapproved, but legally valid, form of divorce. Changing social conditions around the world have led to increasing dissatisfaction with traditional Islamic law of divorce since the early 20th century and various reforms have been undertaken in different countries. Contrary to practices adopted in most Muslim-majority countries, Muslim couples in India are not required to register their marriage with civil authorities.

Muslim marriages in India are considered to be a private matter, unless the couple decided to register their marriage under the Special Marriage Act of 1954. Owing to these historical factors, the checks that have been placed on the husband’s unilateral right of divorce by governments of other countries, such as prohibition of instant divorce, have not been implemented in India.

muslim woman praying.jpg

There was a desperate ned to ban this cult because of the following reasons:

  • It creates Inequality between men and women. Thus, violating one of our fundamental rights—right to equality.
  • It’s immoral towards women which is unacceptable in Indian society.
  • The practice brings women—who are completely dependent on men for their livelihood—into the streets. And, many of them suicide too.

Quran was revealed on him from the creator which includes guidance for people and Islamic laws. Since these laws are revealed by the creator himself and there is no one who is more just than him then the question of injustice to anyone does not rises here. Even if we talk about concept of divorce in Islam.

Usually, the term is used to signify that after saying divorce three times, then couple cannot be together ever but reality is something different, actually the concept of instant divorce doesn’t exist in Quran. It’s something misinterpreted and invented by people.

For more details, one can refer to chapter 65 of the holy Quran that deals with the issue of divorce.